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Monday, January 30, 2012

Relationship Advice - Why Moving in Together Can Mess Up A Relationship

By living together you assume that you will feel closer together, but as any married couple will tell you, living together is not the same thing as growing closer in intimacy. Moving in together might seem like a great idea, but it's a decision that needs to be thought about with clarity and gravity. Relationships that are built backwards have attachments without commitment and are vulnerable to the wind.

When there's a change or a crisis, is there commitment and resolve enough between the two of you to stick together and work through them? While the benefits of living together might seem attractive, the downsides could be greater than the benefits. Lastly, relationships suffer when people move in together because it creates unhealthy attachments.

Two people like each other and have been going out for a while. Here are three reasons why moving in together is going to ruin relationships. Taking the next step in relationships can be a difficult decision, no matter what stage in the relationship. That's why with matchmaking, it becomes easier to meet someone who shares your interests.

They don't stand the test of time because it's inevitable that hard times will come. It seems like the likely next step should be to move in together and get to experience more intimacy on a daily basis, right? What living together does to relationships is to raise the expectation without setting the rules for intimacy and that is a recipe for disappointment. People still need to work through their issues, even in marriage. Growing in intimacy takes work, time and deliberate action, and while living together may provide more opportunities for that, it doesn't guarantee it.

The second reason why moving in together ruins relationships is that it magnifies the issues and can exacerbate the issues in both people. John Smithe is an ex These three points are important enough to consider and hopefully talk about with one another. Naturally, you develop emotional dependencies, but what happens when the plans that both of you made together change?

Before moving in, things seem to be going great, and the two of you are spending almost every day together, doing things a married couple would do, planning together, showing up at events and parties together, and even sharing financial responsibilities together. Relationships take a lot of work, and to get to the point where you are thinking about taking the next step can be difficult to get to. And when you're ready to take the next step, just think of these three things, and hopefully, you'll make the best decision. But that's where it can all go wrong.

Just as when people get married they aren't running away from their problems and wounds, people who live together need to face the reality that living together causes and stirs up more conflict. And you both want to take the next step in intimacy and live together. Unless there is a resolution to resolve that conflict as it arises, it can be a very caustic situation and may damage the relationship even more.

Maybe, maybe not, but regardless of what the answer is, you've already made the attachments. Well, you might want to think again. When you're living together, you're sharing the same space, the same things, and the same time with each other. As it's been said, a house built on sand cannot stand. Living together isn't the answer for peoples who fight a lot and want peace - it isn't a fix-all, in other words. The first reason is that moving in together creates a false sense of intimacy in relationships.

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